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[Seamus]

I was led to have Thai food tonight. Specifically, Pad Thai. It's cliche, but it's so gooood! Anyway, I got stoned before digging in, so as to enhance my appetite and generally mellow out on another friday evening well earned.

As I began to eat, I became mindful of a presence in the room and gratitude filled my heart. Actually it was before I ate, when I was walking back into the living room. I cried out in recognition, "I love You!", and a bit of embarrassment for my lack of appreciation of the presence in the room. It is Ahn. He accepts and loves me unconditionally, and i can feel that viscerally when I am grateful. He's always been there, but due to my complaining (self-victimization), I have been unaware. I have felt alone. We aren't alone, any of us. Because we exist, we always exist, and our whole life is a gift we can shape through keeping to the contract. I am learning that I am just a fractal of the larger whole. or, a part (but the part contains the whole, as is seen with the mandelbrot set) of God. Since our creation as observers essentially granted us co-godhood, and we do get to choose the nature of the lessons we get, be they painful or pleasant.

eating this marvelous food makes it all even better

[permie1]

Since our creation as observers essentially granted us co-godhood, and we do get to choose the nature of the lessons we get, be they painful or pleasant.

co-godhood? we do get to choose the nature of the lessons we get? I don't mean to poopoo on your religious experience but... actually I do. Where did you make the turn and fall in the LOA trap?

[Seamus]

OK, let's back up a bit.

This isn't about law of attraction. This is about my relationship with Ahn. I've been moping around for weeks, griping inwardly about the fact that the illusion is no longer effective for me, nor is this life very attractive. Last night, I got an inkling that my relationship to Ahn is fractal in nature, i.e. that I am a subharmonic of Ahn. Ahn is aware of this, and in creating me, she created that harmonic relationship. That's why Ahn has to assume a form for us to relate to her, because she is so vastly above us that we literally cannot and could not "see" her unless she did so. It would be like looking into a huge mirror, and seeing nothing but a huge reflection of our selves, but in this case so huge it makes the Earth look like a mote of dust. Invisible on our scale, essentially.

My doldrums may have had something to do with a recalibration of my senses and sensibilities. I find it interesting that Roage and I have both pulled out of them at the same time. It does not do to have a son of God walking around without a self-satisfying purpose. I also discovered some unprocessed dark content (thanks Roage)

Our co-godhood is not the same thing as that co-creatorship that LOA peddles. Co-godhood is a state of being, not a concept to be used as a tool to try to bend the universe to our will. While I didn't express it very eloquently, I meant to say something along the lines of "I intentionally entered the game to play the game, not to see through it and then gripe about it having no meaning. Ahn wants me to play at really being interested in what's available to me, because that's where she has me." I did not mean to say "I can manifest the things I want". More like "I need to get up off my butt and do and get the things and activities that interest me."

And, as far as choosing the nature of the lessons I get, isn't it already part of the model that we choose them before we're born? But what I meant was we get to choose whether we want to stomp our feet and resist, or surrender and trust. I believe in that choice. Whether it was made before I was born is irrelevant, just as time itself is irrelevant.

[permie1]

Thank-you for clarifying and sharing. Spoken or written language is more and more problematic.

[Seamus]

As always, I am grateful for the opportunity for exercising mental functions to clarify and elucidate.