DavyDc wrote:Thanks, that's the first time somebody mentions that to me. Offcourse, It's just me that 'uses' that way of expression. It's probably something more sophisticated expressing through me
But of course! But don't hesitate to take credit for the ways in which you seek excellence and clarity. You are, after all, a son of the Most High God.
Also, if I had more knowledge of the English language I could use more words I don't use now. The words like you use like 'exhilarated', 'foreboding',... Those are words I do not use a lot in English. Or they just didn't come up to me in English. I know what they mean in Flemish...
That -by the way- is my native language. Mon Francais est terrible!
Whoops! My mistake. I was sure from a couple of your minor errors that you were a Franc.
There was definitely an exhilarated feeling. Accompanied with an energized feeling. Like I could never run out of fuel.
That makes it sound as if the trip you mentioned below, actually lasted longer than you think. You may have gotten an accidentally high dose. That happened to me with mushrooms one time, and it was a turning point. (that was the trip where I faced so much dark content.)
Actually, there were all the things you mention. There were nights I didn't sleep and just kept working on things in my house or couldn't stop reading and read all night long. Until the rising sun made me aware it was time to go to bakery. Always the first client, and always warm bread. Hmm. But what I didn't know at the time was that it was a real gift to walk around likethat. I definitely acknowledged God (Ahn) by that time but not at the amount I do now (And I did not yet find this website).
Everything happens at exactly the right moment.
The difference is that now, I just feel normal. No 'saying the exact right words to people' No 'moving the exact right way' No 'unbelievable perfect timing' No 'come in come in! I have food and drinks! stay over if you please! Let's have amazing talks my friends!'.
And there you touch on one of the biggest issues with enlightenment. You can't take anyone else with you. You can't bring your friends along. You can make new friends who are appropriate to your level, but your high school buddies are not going to understand you. They might actually fear you, because the FearMaster (Ego) runs their lives without restraint.
But I know this is not the right time for all that. It's just not possible. At that time (8months ago), I lived on my own, in a rental house in Ghent. But because the 'Glimpse' ended and I couldn't handle the responsibilities that came with it I am now required to live at my Grandma's for a while. I now know I live here to see the difference between people who totally block the flow and live from fear(Grandma) and myself.
I imagine it's painful to see someone you care about living under that burden. But part of what we are here to understand is that everyone gets to watch whatever movie they want to, whether it be full of fear or full of love. Read that book, Illusions... It's really excellent! It illustrates the 'movie' model exquisitely.
I can tell because I give her all these new types of thinking and it is so hard to reach her. It's like deepdown she knows 'our way' is simpler and comes with no worries but she's stuck in her way of thinking.
To offer freedom to willing slaves is very dangerous. She is living the life she chose to live. The slave may turn on you and try to coerce you to be as enslaved as they are. One of the hardest things about being free is allowing other people to remain chained if they want to.
But I just found a new place to live in Ghent and I'm moving in the week of the 2nd of February. I can really feel that's gonna be the place where all the 'Gliding the waves-fun' is going to be. At that place I can completely 'let go' and glide. I know, the time for doing it is only now. Now, now, now. But I'm doing it and it just doesn't work out. There's my Grandmother! Sitting in a chair, blocking the waves of every step I make. I'm really chained up here, but! I'm pleased with it, because it is with my complete respect for her. Without her being born on this planet, I wasn't born on this planet. She just doesn't understand what's going on in the world. Completely ignorant and I would just scare her with my facts about this funhouse.
"Don't scare the children, Lyle!"
Seamus wrote: If I may pitch in my 2 Euros, You will see the world from a unified point of view, instead of the divided one you now are accustomed to. I'm guessing something happened to you to suppress your ego, and its effect was transitory. No doubt it was a turning point in your life.
Speaking of which, what's your background? I am in the Pacific Northwest of the USA, working as a printer. I have a degree in French, and by your usage, I would guess you to be a Francophone, rather than a Flemish speaker. Am I right?
You hit the spot! It all started with a badtrip on LSD.
Yeah, well, that's how it happened to me, too. But the more time passes between your 'present' and the time of the trip, you will value it more and more and eventually you will realize it was not a bad trip at all, but you were (in your Observer's wisdom) forcing yourself to look at some of the more frightening things in your psyche.
It was only the second time I used it (I never used it again since then). I remember seeing a vision from the hand of God. I saw the most awful but amazing things at the same time. It almost completely suppressed my ego. What did I know what was happened...
I felt silence, complete silence. Peace. After that experience I rushed through books about religion, science, spirituality,... From that point on I understood the term 'surfing the net' because I've had never such an interesting friend as the Internet. He talks to me about our society, banks, God, The Nature of Our Reality, Ego, ...
That's interesting, You call the internet a 'he'. Perhaps it is already conscious, as some people have predicted would happen.
What do you mean by 'pitching in your 2 Euros' ?
it's an american expression meaning 'let me share my opinion' It's things like that which make English, especially American English, such a great language.
And like said before, I'm Flemish... But I feel more like an Earthling.
And about the antipsychotics. I'm going to reduce it until I completely quit it. I'm also searching for an open-mind Psychiatrist that would accompany me in the progress of quiting. If that is a good idea? I know I shouldn't trust them but.. It maybe is just my old me thinking that it is necessary.
maybe. deep inside you know what you need. And you will get it.
After writing this I'm going to continue watching 'Friends'. Funny indeed. It's interesting to watch it because 60% of the time they are all Ego-talking. For me it's like a reminder, a list of do's and dont's. I wonder how many people in the world watch shows like that like we do. (It's not on tv by the way, dvd)
I also downloaded Revolver. A movie that is mentioned here many times. Can somebody tell me why I should watch it? Or will I figure it out when I press play?
Oh, you'll figure it out. Just make sure you have the American version. The british version is not so good. You can tell the difference when Jake is falling down the stairs early on in the movie. In the "right" version, Jake is narrating the fall. In the British version, there is only the music playing. If you find you have the wrong version, stop watching it and get the right one. Only after watching the right one, is the British one useful to you at all. And even then, it's just so-so. I never would have imagined two versions of the SAME film could be so different.
With much love,
Davy
(P.S. You guys do know that the Fries you call French Fries are actually Belgian Fries huh? The French ran away with it!
Never trust the French
We just call them Fries or 'Friet', pronounced 'freet' in Flemish. I really don't know why I'm telling you this but I felt the urge to do so)
That's cool. Hey can you understand Icelandic?
First, In a conversation, a discussion or a reaction on something: Is it true that you immidiatly know that it's your Ego reacting? It's like when it happens that immediatly after you think 'Oh, that was not the right reaction that was my ego talking there!' And sometimes it goes really fast. So, how can I know the difference between a reaction of the Ego and the Self. Is it the feeling you get? I think so, but then the fact is I have my ego more ...
